Monday, July 31, 2006

oh, hell no.


this weekend was exhausting! saturday we did a lot of work on the new house. i primered and painted the bathroom, painted the ceilings of the master bedroom and the office, weeded in the backyard, washed the walls of the living room with this toxic chemical goo...ugh. the ceiling painting was the worst. my arms were so sore. i also broke the handle of the special ceiling painter-roller thing. oooooooops.

the next morning i woke up bright and early to go to new york with my sister, my 17-year old niece, and her friend. we really did have a good time, but it was also exhausting. my niece wanted to go to all the rah-shah-shah stores on 5th ave, like saks (even though no one had any intention nor the means to buy anything there). i never do that kind of stuff when i go to the city to hang out. when i go i usually head straight for the village, or hang out with my brooklyn friend matt in williamsburg and stuff. anyway, we hit up a bunch of stores like that, and then we FINALLY went into H&M, which i love. we have once close to where i live, but nothing like this one! so huge! i got a really cute outfit there for really cheap, so i was pleased. but the day could be best described as "power shopping." yuck. oh yeah, we hit up daffy's, which seemed like one could find some killer stuff for dirt cheap. but, the place had 7 floors, and we had no time to explore. so i just hovered like a vulture around the chairs and waited for someone to leave, and i pounced like a puma so i could rest my tired little feet.

my niece also wanted to see times square, which i totally could have done without. i hate times square. so many people, too much stimulation...aaaccck...but hey. it was her first nyc visit, so i guess it had to be done.

but the ickiness of times square does not even hold a candle to the horrors that inhabit the american girl store. my sister also has a 5-year old girl, who is WAAAY into her american girl doll. she has outfits that match outfits that the doll wears, all this furniture, some little dog (that also gets matching outfits)...it's really bizarre. i wasn't into all the doll crap when i was little. except for barbie, of course. but eventually i chopped off all their hair and melted their faces. ANYWAY, this americal girl store was packed with crazy mothers with their bratty daughters (and a few men who looked like they wanted to kill themselves). that is a world i will never, nor do i want to, understand. this store even had a damn salon where people did the dolls' hair, i shit you not. ugh. if i ever have a daughter, she is not going to have anything to do with american girl or any of its millions of stupid accessories, all of which are really expensive and she won't even care about in a year anyway. soon my little niece will be cutting off her american girl doll's hair and melting her face off---YOU JUST WAIT!!!

although chris put it into perspective when he pointed out that if there was a store that was 5 floors of nothing but blythe dolls, i would be in heaven. and he's right. so i guess i am horribly judgemental or something.

anyway, we barely made the bus back, we were running like crazy people (okay, that's a lie, we were just walking really really fast), and then the only seats left on the bus were in the very back, where the floor was really hot (like, so hot that when i picked up my bags off the floor, they felt like they were about to start smoldering). some lady took a massive poop in the bathroom, which we were sitting right next to, about 10 minutes into the ride. also, the AC didn't really work back there. *heavy sigh*

Saturday, July 29, 2006

ugh, crop circles are *so* 1994...


...but here's how to make them.

tori spelling, screwed out of untold millions by being cut out of her father's will, is selling her clothes on eBay. ouch.

vote for your favorite episode of "the office" and the winner airs next month. plus you can enter to go to sundance next year. there are clips of every episode to refresh your memory. i voted for "basketball," but it was so hard to pick a favorite! maybe i should've picked "the fire." or, "the fight." every episode is great.

kiddie rekord king.

to do list blog. i used to be a big list-writer, but not so much anymore. i wonder what happened. i guess i just stopped caring...

adrienne bar-boobie wrote a book!

info on "i'm not there," the bob dylan movie where 67 people portray him. ummm, richard gere? they couldn't do better than that??

blogathon 2006: posting music all day today for charity.

happy birthday, wil wheaton.

Friday, July 28, 2006

Head On, apply directly to your forehead. Head On, apply directly to your forehead. Head On, apply directly to your forehead.

WHAT THE HELL IS IT?!?!?


oh, this is what it is.

in other news...

here's an interview with creed. no word if he stole anything during the interview.

oh crap, i'm missing evel knievel days!!!

mmmmm...liquid chubby hubby...

i dig these groovy freaky blythe dolls, i wish i had one or two of 'em...

i predict she'll be unemployable and in rehab in 6 months.

what i'm watching right now.

happy little post.


i wish they'd actually publish it on a long paper-towel roll thing. that would be really cool. seriously.

related: this guy is taking the "on the road" route and blogging about it. i love it!!

ed helms joins the cast of "the office!!" ed was there when i was in the "daily show" audience 2 years ago. yep. i was hoping for some colbert, of course, but we got ed and lewis black and that was just fine with us.

1969 spiegel catalog. really groovy.

here's some fox news reporter ripping some dude a new one for being a prankster. not "best. video. ever." but funny.

white stripes on "the simpsons" info, and the new raconteurs video.

long live bob ross. (when bob ross passed away, i actually painted the words "long live bob ross" on my bedroom wall. and my friend sharon will vouch for this: we got an apartment together when we were like 19, and we painted a happy little tree on the fridge--which was labeled "happy little tree.")













vinyl record generator. FUN!

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Q: how did the mathematician get rid of his constipation?


A: he worked it out with a pencil. :)

toys for your raw meat-loving children.

gum for your drug-addicted children.

awww, poor bob geldof. i bet his gigs look like the spinal tap puppet show.

this is a musical i would totally go see. and i hate musicals.

acupuncture without needles, via 1974.

i'm still #3!! wheeeeee! i don't know *what* is up with the guy who is #1. he either sits at his computer all day and all night, psychotically voting for himself, or he hacked the site. insane!!

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

free cornballing and analraping and loose seals


yippee!

justin theroux (subject of my strange dream the other night) dishes on "inland empire." well, as much as one can dish on a film that even the actors have no idea what it's about.

dirty car art.

groovy, non dirty car-related art. i want some.

this guy rocks.

weird laws. i violate one of the pennsylvania laws sometimes...guess which one?

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

quickie linkage...


...just so you guys don't forget about me. :)

i'm #3!!! woo-hoo!

this would benefit the lactose intolerant people, i reckon.

okay. did i NOT JUST MENTION "the state" a week or so ago? yes, i did. they must be listening to me!

decorating one's cubicle is now a recognized artform. please enjoy my cubicle, pictured above. i am not looking forward to returning to my cubicle tomorrow after a week off. booooo!

Monday, July 24, 2006

did you miss me?

ugh, i am sore, achey, stressed-out, exhuasted, and overwhelmed. i also owe everyone in the world emails. :/ it may be a while until i get caught up again...this house is sooooooo much work. and it's been soooo friggin' HOT the past week! but, our next-door neighbors gave us a fresh pan of brownies last night, so things are lookin' up. :) i thought that was so cute and old-school of them to give us baked goods to welcome us to the 'hood. below are just a few pictures of what's been going on with the house...i can't wait to get the floors sanded and stained, and to paint everything. then it will seem like we are actually getting somewhere.

this is what the living room and dining room looked like when we owned it for approx. one hour, right before chris ripped out all the carpet in the entire house:



awwww, look, we're not completely insane yet! i miss those days...















bastard wallpaper paste.













f you, wallpaper!!!













and now, some linkage. i honestly have no idea what's been going on for the past week. one thing that is exciting to me, however, is this newly-discovered version of "something." i heart george.

oh, and I'M # 4 NOW!!! please keep voting, this is incredible!!! tell your freinds, tell your mom, tell your weird internet-addicted uncle. vote for mondo!!!

50 albums that changed music.

25 most important questions in the history of the universe.

top 10 rock "diss" songs.

not starring.

here's madonna showing lenny kravitz her 48-year old hoo-hah.

tenacious d movie!

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

holy crap, i'm #6!!!


this is amazing, THANK YOU!!! please keep voting for me! and please don't be frightened by all the new people who have entered the contest. it may take a little longer to come across my little 'ol picture, but EVERY VOTE COUNTS! again, thank you to all who are voting for me. i really, REALLY want these tickets! neil!!! willie!!!! front row!!! COME ON!!

ok, we did our first official first full day of house stuff. my main job today consisted of slathering the dining room walls with goo and scraping off the wallpaper paste with a little tool called a paper tiger. which made me sing that beck song in my head all day. for the record, i would like to horribly mutilate the person who invented wallpaper. oh, and i pulled about 5 million staples from the floors with a pair of pliers. i have a blister on my hand the size of detroit. but whatever.

did i mention that we are gonna be next-door neighbors with a cop? yep. a real cop. we saw him come home today, with his cop outfit on and everything...so weird. not that i am MISS ILLEGAL ACTIVITY or anything, but it's kinda weird with a bona fide COP right next door...

anyway...

70's blacklight posters. (via boing boing)

this is what a woman raised by wild dogs looks like.

invent your own suri. because the real one doesn't exist anyway.

see? there are many employment opportunities (okay, 12) for people like me who have a penchant for crazy hair once in a while...

chelsea hotel blog.

see? i KNEW it was gonna be good!! I KNEW IT! (i'm being sarcastic, because not allowing reviewers to screen a flick is always bad news. but i know i will love it anyway. this is not an oscar caliber movie, people. it's just good, cheesy fun. SCREW YOU, CRITICS!!!)

ow. ohhhhhh, achey achey.



yowza, did we kick boo-tay tonight! we closed on the house at 4, left the bank by 5, stopped at the apartment and changed, got to our house by 6, and ripped out all the carpet and ripped off the top layer of wallpaper in the kitchen, dining room, one of the bathrooms, and a bedroom by 10 p.m. very impessive, but we are SO GONNA BE HURTIN' TOMORROW. man, i can feel the burn in my arms already...

but it was so cool. borderline enjoyable for me, even (chris may have a different take on things, since he was the icky carpet-ripper-upper). it felt so different from the painting and whatnot that we've done for our apartment. 'cause, you know, it's OURS. we even had our first visitors, ryan and tracy and their 3 adorable kids. yay!

when we closed on the house, at first i was so sad i almost wanted to cry. BECAUSE...we bought the house from a couple who filed for bankruptcy, and they were really, really nice. i guess pretty much all the money for the house went straight to their creditors. the woman was talking about how, in addition to losing their house, they had to put their dog and their ferret to sleep. man, i almost cried right there. they did find a home for the turtle, however, just yesterday. i guess they moved into an apartment, so maybe they can't have pets, i don't know. and then THAT statement about the turtle made me think about how i took pictures of their personal items and posted them on the internet. :( i just felt so bad for them; they seemed like good people. the guy even said that if we needed to call him for anything at all (like if we can't figure out how something works or if we have questions), that we should not hesitate to call him. i thought that was really nice. but, i must admit that the guilt (or empathy or whatever it was) faded away when we left and was replaced by total excitement and glee. is that bad?

another wonderful thing was, as soon as we got in the house and looked out the big dining room windows, we saw a bunny and 2 robins in our backyard. that bunny made me so happy! living on the 2nd floor on a busy main street of a city doesn't offer those types of warm, fuzzy goodness. we had lots of fireflies when it got dark, too. awesome.

when things start shaping up, i will post "before" and "after" pictures. and maybe some "during" pics, if i am motivated enough. ohh yeah, the central air TOTALLY works. yesssss...

maybe we'll make this for the house...? eh. probably not. but maybe!

how ironic. (because, you know, carrots are supposed to help your eyesight.)

file this one under, "ewwwww gross!"

i just cannot believe the animated version of pamela anderson on her site! hahahahaha. i do hope those are vegan cookies she's holding...oh, and regarding the announcement--ewwwww gross!

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

hot enough for ya?


ugh. this heat sucks. in other news, we close on the house today, so i don't know how much bloggin' i will be doing in the next week...we both took a week off to start working on the house. please keep your fingers crossed that the AC works in the new house...we still aren't sure if it does. ugh. i can just imagine trying to take off wallpaper and re-tiling floor and painting and whatnot in a sizzling, stinky house. and it doesn't excite me.

1950's DIY projects. maybe i should do some of these this week...

12 delightfully odd concept albums.

uppers.org. not about pills.

ahhhh, dig mickey rourke's shirt!

here are the myspace profiles for all of your favorite awful reality "stars."

check out this great photo i found while looking for turquoise toilet seats on eBay:

Monday, July 17, 2006

i say "justin theroux" a lot in this post.

i'm assuming that this is a joke (or at least a jokester trying to gain illustrious youtube fame), but here it is anyway...



i think i see greg brady hanging out the window with a flashlight and a kazoo...

in other news, i had this really long, involved dream last night about justin theroux, who for some reason showed up at a family function (which was in a dank, gray, cubicle-ridden office space). my dad was there, and he thought that this justin theroux character was trying to steal me away from my man (hi honey! yes, you were in the dream, too). my dad would go into a blinding rage every time justin theroux tried to talk to me. yet he didn't make him leave, he just wanted us to stay away from each other. so, i changed my outfit before dinner, and my dad thought i was trying to woo justin theroux or something, and he picked him up and threw him out a window. ?!?!? ha, so odd...i remember the outfit i put on, too: a pair of those black beatniky/80's madonna-type leggings, and a weird skirt on top that was all different lengths and had strings hanging from it (it kind of looked like it was made from a bunch of neckties--it also made my ass look HUGE), and a big 'ol white man's shirt. and i put a great big bow in my hair. yes, if an emsemble like that wouldn't woo any man, i don't know what will. ?!?!?

Friday, July 14, 2006

"they're all gonna laugh at you!!!!!"


top 10 worst comics ever, as a slide show, according to maxim.

i guess christian bale lost all that weight in "the machinist" for nothing. and here he thought he was going for authenticity.

how could you not have a good day when you eat this for breakfast?

young girls are so dumb. i should know, i was one once.

what's hiding in owen wilson's shag?

bird's eye views of famous homes.

"the office" has web shows now. woo!

info about gram parsons, and the film about him that's now out on DVD.

carrie: the musical. AWESOME!

i forgot to mention that i got my dylan tickets on wednesday. fan club pre-sale, and we get to go in the stadiums 1/2 hour before everybody else, because we're special. got tix for the reading show (of course) and also to the fishkill show, which is in upstate new york. which is near woodstock. which at one point in my life was my absolute favorite place on the planet. so, the day after that show we will be kickin' it in woodstock, and i am *SO* happy. i haven't been there in a few years, so i am kinda worried that things have changed. one time i went up there and *BAM* the tinker street cafe, which is practically a landmark, was closed. just gone. poof. bought by the photography studio that inhabited the upstairs (which is where bob dylan used to live). i was really sad. i plan on a comprehensive woodstock post soon, because it is such a great place and i have such great memories, pictures, and stories from that place.

here's a teaser: levon helm of the band kissed me in woodstock at the joyous lake. and i have photos. :)

Thursday, July 13, 2006

transformers - more than meets the eye


a transformer blew on my block last night. i have never heard a noise like that before! like, "BOOM! sizzle sizzle sizzle..." there was a big live wire hanging down. but, the power came back on, so no problem, right? well, another one (or the same one? who knows) blew like 2 hours later. still no power at home. booooooo! AND--the power went off just before the premiere of project runway. double booooooo!!!! >:(

would i pay k-fed to come to my party? HELL YES.

ummmm...EWWWW. eww eww eww.

mmmm...yams. this is indeed on my desktop now.

funny mr. t story.

the museum of temporary art.

more raconteurs, less white stripes.

here's ted nugent before he started sucking both musically and personally.

p.s. i am #12 on the "top of the haystack" farm aid front row ticket contest thingie. woo-hoo! if you can deal with refreshing your screen and weeding through all the other contestants until i appear, please keep voting for me! thankssssssss...

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

shine on...


...you crazy diamond. :(

vote for mondo


so, i'm trying to win front row farm aid tickets. i really really love neil and willie (that mellencamp isn't all bad either), and who knows who else will pop up on the lineup (hopefully bob?). anyhoo, this contest is a series of battles between 2 people. and then you have to vote for who is more deserving of the tickets, and the winner gets them. i am not sure how to specifically find one of my battles...here is my page. apparently just clicking on my picture a million times doesn't equal a vote.

i realized that if you just click on the "vote" button at the top, you get new battles each time. i was voting for other people for a while, trying to get to my battle, and then i realized that i probably shouldn't be voting for other people. oop. anyway, i really appreciate any effort anyone makes to vote for me!

"if you vote for me, all of your wildest dreams will come true."

p.s. my little blurb wasn't BS, either; i come from a farmy family. thanks!

tuesday is for watchy-watchy

the below clip is specifically for my local peeps. hopefully this will make you as happy as it made me when i found it!!


i mentioned stella once before...she really is the poor man's elvira. but we all loved her. be sure to click around the tags, especially the KYW tag to see some 70's and 80's news clips.

more visual goodness:

dig on mr. dante fontana's visual guidance ltd. you won't be sorry.

remember the mighty heroes?!?!?

ahh, thursday night memories...

worst. song. ever!

my 2 favorite men, together.

dylan's warhol screen test.

also:

hmmm, maybe i'll actually attend a broadway show now...?

bohemian ink.

the dewey donation system.

raconteurs, norwegian-style.

Monday, July 10, 2006

pull my daisy



and behold the totally insane gertie, who maimed me this morning. yeah, she's cute. don't let that fool you.

also:

the cult of kubrick.

yes!! yes yes yes yes yes!

1981.

how to eat at fast food places and not die 20 years too soon.

etch-a-sketch art. the only thing i could ever manage to make was stairs. :/

my cat is insane. really. she is.


my freaking cat bit me on the hand this morning, and drew blood. for no good reason!! i was trying to close the closet door, and she was in the way, so i gently moved her over. i guess she wanted to be trapped in the closet like r kelly or something, because she bit me when i moved her out of the way! i yelled at her so loud and swooshed at her with a pillow. then she looked all innocent and sheepish, like, "what? what did i do?" YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID, GERTIE! and you better be thinking about what you've done ALL DAY. mommy's mad at you.

then i got to work and realized that i forgot my lunch. *sigh* anyway...

people who have stayed/lived at the chelsea hotel.

patty hearst is on the new york social register.

the BBC test card gallery.

wavy "don't eat the brown acid" gravy's collage art.

conelrad - check out gene hackman!!

the black panther coloring book. wow. (link via anton)

there's a moon out tonight...

i would never go to this, ever.

hey, i was at this show!

this one, too!

Saturday, July 08, 2006

happy birthday to the beck.





















p.s. we're all very glad that you have improved so much musically since 1986. :)

yes, that's a real turtle.

so, chris and i were able to go into our new digs recently to measure and take pictures and whatnot. the people we bought the house from still have a ton of stuff in there (we close in about 2 weeks), so i snapped some pics. here are the highlights.



















also:

i wonder if he was listening to "ride the lightning."

13 things that do not make sense.

the ten greatest books about rock & roll.

Thursday, July 06, 2006

$240 dollahs worth o' puddin'

i can't believe it never occurred to me until just now to search for "the state" on youtube. they have WHOLE ENTIRE EPISODES ON THERE!!! WOW. oh, happy day! kenny will be so excited---he's gonna yell, "I WANNA DIP MY BALLS IN IT!!" for all the world to hear. so, i guess i will be watching these all night long...that is, until "the office" comes on...3 episodes in a row tonight. and speaking of "the office..."

here are season 3 "spoilers." don't look if you don't want to, but i did and it reveals practically nothing. since i am myspace friends with pam, i read some of that stuff already. i'm kind of relieved, because i was addicted to reading the television without pity message boards when "six feet under" was down to its last few episodes, and i knew exactly when and how nate was going to die, and all the details of the last episode. clearly you can tell that i was the kid who snooped for her christmas presents and even snuck downstairs at night to carefully open the tape on the gifts and take a peek inside because she just couldn't stand it...anyway, i don't want to know anything about what happens with jim and pam until it airs. nothing. i just have to learn to control myself.

related: "the office" was nominated for best comedy and best actor (steve carell) emmys. not related: this is what you get when you type in "emmy.com".

will arnett got a best supporting actor nomination. COME ON!!! :)


my lands, i sound like the bigggest tv geek on earth right now.






also:

farm aid is in philly this year! sweet.

gram parsons, cosmic cowboy. posted because i am wearing my flying burrito bros. t-shirt today.

my name's mondo, and i'm outta heeeeeere...

As I ride on my horse through the countryside/I said “come on, Lady L, let me give you a ride"


still icky, but back at work. i am so dedicated.

"steal this book," wiki-style. i bought the book for someone and then stole it from him. i left it in my bathroom for years, kind of hoping someone would steal it, but no one did. meh.

here's a list of problems solved by macgyver.

bob dylan ticket stub and poster archive.

1957 home meal planner. (via pcl linkdump)

this auction ends in a mere 5 hours; you better get bidding!!

here's some info about the mall that they filmed that scene from "the blues brothers" in. note: i love this blog long time! something about seeing pictures of malls in the 70's makes me really happy (especially when the malls where i grew up are featured).

snakes on a plane song!

i watched this all day yesterday. (this show, not just this clip. although that would be really funny if i only watched this clip all day.)



Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Monday, July 03, 2006

i think i'll drink a few for jim morrison tonight.


maybe i'll have one for michael mcclure while i'm at it...just for good measure. he's not dead or anything, but he deserves a drink in his honor, too, i reckon... i met him once. he was nice.

i can almost hear my boyfriend groaning, "oh, GREAT..." as he reads this. i'm sure he is envisioning me drunkenly singing along to doors songs and watching DVDs and talking about how into them i used to be and generally being a silly goose. i'll try to control myself, honey. :) and don't be bringing home no sixer of tall budweisers!!

anyway, yeah... today is the day jim morrison died.

so, rest in peace, jim . :/

too bad jim never did a drug freak-out classroom scare film...

i wonder if jim's "wife" will have anything interesting to say today...

you KNOW you want these childhood drawings. you KNOW you want them.

let's not forget brian jones, who also passed away on this day.

these talking cats freak me out!!! the one at the end sounds like an old drunk man, crying.

the american roadside.

are you too old for myspace?

cheesy movies.

drive-in movie ads.

so, are you in the office today? are you annoyed because of that? because we should totally have today off in addition to tomorrow, right?! grrrr.
My Office Annoyance Rating
i am only 35% annoying at the office.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

Saturday, July 01, 2006

"you can't buy a car with cookies, edward."



you know, i really savor my first saturday morning cup of coffee and smoke. it's just like...ahhhhhhhhh!

okay, moving on.

i sure do like that johnny depp. he's all over the place right now what with "pirates 2." (the cool kids just call it "pirates 2.") i have no intention of seeing "pirates 2," unless it's like maybe a year from now, on encore or something, on a hungover sunday afternoon. i would never go see it intentionally. i saw the first one in the theater and i thought it was one of the worst movies i'd ever seen in my life. i realize that i am one of the few people on earth who feel this way, but i do know of others that hated it as well.

now, don't get me wrong, i realize that johnny gives a great performance. all gay and keith richards and stuff. he's the only good thing about that movie. i realize it's a family film, and maybe when i have kids i'll like it better. but, it's just not my cup of tea.

anyway, here are my top 5 favorite johnny things:

1. ed wood. this just goes without saying. this is truly his greatest performance. oh, wait. maybe not...

2. fear and loathing in las vegas. ok. this is his greatest performance. and i've had a lot of inside jokes with friends regarding this movie and quoting it a lot. i just think this movie is so amazing. this is the only book that was made into a movie that actually came frighteningly close to the way things looked in my head. it's a surreal experience, watching that movie. so great.

3. edward scissorhands. there are a lot of good lines from this one, too. i love the way he says "glands." i also often say, "blend, blend, blend!" this one came out when i was a senior in high school, and i watch it every time it's on. this movie is so special.

4. private resort. in the complete opposite direction of "edward scissorhands," this movie is SO BAD. like, have a get-together and have a few drinks and watch this movie and laugh at it kind-of bad. and i like movies like that.

5. cry-baby. it's john waters, man!!! i saw this movie in the theater with my older sister. she said she'd treat us to the movies and i could pick the movie, in an effort to get closer or something. i picked "cry-baby." she was like, "uhhhhh...what did we just see?" classic.

in other news:

dig this glass chicken!

this looks so good...

how to convert an old tv into a fishtank.

update: it's a little later now, and i'm continuing my nice morning by watching "blank stare," the "strangers with candy" two-parter where jerri joins a cult. "i'm gonna sit at the welcome table...sing about it!"