i just don't know what to do with myself.

i am bored and restless, so i made south park characters of me and chris. note the ever-present coffee and cigarette on me (i'm trying to do better, but i smoked like a fiend today), and the ever-present stubble on chris.

amy sedaris' amazon list for entertaining. the list itself is, of course, entertaining.

grey gardens blog! if you've never seen the original film, i highly recommend that you do. it's crazy.

regular movies done up with grindhouse-style posters.

pulp muppets!

sort-of related: sad kermit. click on "audio" and listen. and weep.

whoah. sarah jessica parker's got some jacked-up feet. see, this is why i wear flats. wear 4" heels and you get 80-year old woman's feet.

if you ever wondered how much celebrity photos get retouched...wonder no more. (click on "portfolio.")

awww. nick drake is my friend, too!

ny times book review of the latest nirvana biography. (registration required.)

this is funny. and this cat looks like a fatter version of gertie.

board games based on tv shows. i had "dukes of hazzard" and "family feud." no one would EVER play "family feud" with me, and it was my favorite. i would always demand to be richard dawson, and i'd be all, "LET'S PLAY THE FEUD!!!" and i would kiss the players on the cheek and make an obnoxious buzzing sound when they got an answer wrong. hmmm, it's just become totally obvious why no one would play with me now...

oops

so, yeah. i totally fubar-ed the funky sideburns/goatee (which turned into a soul patch) thing i was going for, so chris had to shave it all off. it was pretty anti-climactic in general.


















also, here's gertie lookin' all cute, burrowed in a blanket on my lap. awwww. glad she's all lovey-dovey now; little does she know is that she's getting fixed in a few days. :/

so, tonight is the facial-hair-cutting ceremony!

what style will it be? who knows. but until then...

for the hipsters: how to speak hip.

ummmm, HELLO? don't see mondo on the list...fools!

"My new Natural Balance® EATABLES™ for Dogs is so appetizing and nutritious, you won’t be able to tell the difference between my EATABLES™ and a home-cooked meal!"

can you spot the drummer?

the top 40 bands in america, according to a bunch of bloggers. do we care?

you should take a cut-up cake to your holiday gatherings this year.

and now i am off to watch the america's next top model marathon on vh-1, while chris makes fun of me for it. fierce!

you have the power!!!

this weekend, chris is going to shave off his beard. i have been instructed to shape his sideburns and/or goatee as i see fit. but i thought it would be way more fun for you, my faithful readers that i love so much, to decide what the fate of his facial follicles shall be! chris has graciously decided to go along with it, and i will post a pic of chris sporting the winning style over the weekend. i can't guarantee that he will keep what is chosen for him, but at least he will look like that for a fleeting moment. so, without further ado...