" can't you see... I love you, Antoine."

i am so obsessed with "eternal sunshine" lately. it's been on the hbo constantly, so i've seen it several times in the past few days after a fairly long break from watching it (and by "fairly long," i mean a month or two). i get this way with all of my favorite movies...i can watch them over and over. i have also been watching "the lost skeleton of cadavra" a lot lately, too. those are 2 wonderful movies for completely different reasons...

i fell in love with "eternal sunshine" within the first 10 minutes of seeing it in the theater. i also was weeping like a damn fool for most of it. it was kind of embarrassing, i just could NOT even take it. it took such an emotional toll on me...i continued to cry when chris and i went to a bar afterwards. he was like, "erm, what the hell is wrong with you?!" hahaha...but you see, chris and i were on "a break" at the time and we saw the movie together and it was just too much for my fragile little mind! there were a LOT of really crazy little things that seemed to directly apply to me, or us or whatever. which is what everybody says about the movie, but it was indeed a bit jarring. at least i wasn't the only one...there were many crying people in the theater. we saw it in the theater again with friends of ours, and i had to really try very hard to keep it together. i remember thinking, "i can't wait until this comes out on DVD so i can weep openly in my home!"

then i got a bootleg copy of the movie to tide me over before it was released on DVD. it had german subtitles and the sound was just a little off from the picture...but i watched it a few times anyway. then i got the super-groovy extra-plus-plus-special deluxe fancy-pants special-edition DVD for valentine's day last year. and we watched it on valentine's day, which was totally appropriate. ahhh yes, crying on valentine's day. fun. at least i wasn't crying and passing out on the bathroom floor, which unfortunately is what happened the previous valentine's day. :(

so, even to this day the movie really makes me cry. the parts that really get me are when joel and clementine are under the quilt and he says,"please, mierzwiak, let me keep this memory...just this one..." and he's reaching for her but she's slipping away...*sniff, sniff* i'm pretty much a mess from that point foward. i cry when they are little kids...i cry when joel is screaming in the snow that he wants to call it off "can you hear me? i don't want this any more, i want to call it off!"

...and then i laugh when i see mark ruffalo dancing in his underwear.

it makes me happy/sad every time i see it. i love how they decide to be together even though they know they are doomed (at least that's what i get from the ending). i love that so many people strongly relate to how real the characters are and how relatable all the relationship-stuff is, yet we are talking about a trippy charlie kaufman film that takes place inside someone's brain. i love that beck did that song for the soundtrack. i love her "love is..." shirt. i love that a guy emailed me the other day, asking me to try to create a similar necklace to the one joel gives clementine so he can give it to the woman he loves. :) yay.

so...yeah. wikipedia has a pretty good entry on the movie.

here's the first draft of the script, which you should read. (via beingcharliekaufman.com. which is run by mick. who is awesome.)

every time i see this picture, i desperately want to dye my hair that color.

here's a pic from a deleted scene. ahhhh, i love her hair color! man, every time i get into this movie i'm all about dyeing my hair. each time i get it back to a "regular" color, which believe me isn't easy, i start messing with it again. i have 2 colors at home right now, just begging to be used...1/2 a container of plum passion and about 1/3 of pillarbox red. that will make a cool color, i reckon. i will be home from work all next week---details of that mess to follow---and i just know that by, like, thursday, boredom and feeling like crap about myself will get the better of me and i'll dye my hair. i just know it. plus, i am fortunate to have a job where not only is the funky hair acceptable, but it is also encouraged. the prez seems to like it, for some reason. unless his constant comments about when i am going to have another crazy color is his demented way of making fun of me...which is entirely possible.

of course, i must mention paul proch, who did joel's journals and artwork in the movie.

check out this chick's tats!

dr. mierzwiak's myspace. i'd add him as a friend, but he hasn't logged in for a while.